Monday, August 24, 2009

About Emotional Abuse

My ex down to a tee - sadly I once believed that the man loved me intensely and believed his lies that the abuse was a sign of his love - that if he didn't love me I would not have 'made him mad'. I know now it was all lies. That is not love.


Anonymous said...

Been watching all of these and thinking about my own relationship.

The financial thing scares the hell out of me right now - I live with my girlfriend right now and we have similar incomes, we split everything down the middle.

Next week I start a new job which will see my take home pay rise to be about 5 times what she makes. How on earth do you make that work without inadvertently ending up in the 'man provides, woman does homely things' or the 'you owe me every penny you have' scenario?

Bad Kitty said...

Difficult thing when one has more money than the other....It doesn't have to end in a power struggle but it sometimes can do. Sadly, the man I referred to in my posts was financially abusive as well, he had far more money than me but stayed in my flat rent free and insisted I went halves with him on the shopping (bearing in mind he was a health food freak and had far more expensive tastes in food than myself). You know, he used to try to control what I ate along with everything else I did and would even express annoyance if I disliked certain foods he liked, along with music and all his other tastes.

The finance thing (if a man earns more) doesn't have to end in a power imbalance but it often can, sadly. I guess it depends how you deal with it, is all I can say to sum it up.